Thursday July 22, 2010 at 1:11pm
I open this with deep and sincere gratitude to Bobby, Kerrie and Noah, whose influence and example was the beginning of the most amazing journey: a healthy relationship with my body.
I went to Brooksville, FL with Noah to meet his parents for the first time. His parents house and property sounded like an idyllic paradise. "The Homestead", he described it. He spoke to me of 'ponds and turkeys, herb gardens and tinctures created by Kerrie, a healing chalet that him and his father built together, a pottery studio and raw food delights'. Really? These people exist? You bet. His father, Bobby and step mother, Kerrie are a super-incredible-powerful healing team. They use innate intelligence and advanced Applied Kinesiology to communicate with the body. I was nervous and excited to meet them, as I was in the process of quitting smoking, quitting fast food, and ceasing all occasional recreational drug use. I was in my last term of massage school (where Noah and I met four years ago) so I was coming into a healthier state of being. I was ready for more. Noah educated me and informed daily of so much knowledge on the body and human health. This was the quality that drew me towards his light. I was thirsty for knowledge, and Noah held the golden goblet of the hydrating healing waters. I gulped it down; the healing waters AND my nervous throat lump as I prayed they didn't think I was totally f****d up!) We arrived, and my believing eyes affirmed the beauty and utopia in the stories. These people were amazing, the real deal. Walking the walk. They had their own catfish pond, ate eggs from their own turkeys, grew most of their own food, had a healing treatment room and so so so much more. There were glass gallon jugs holding water, and on the outside of the jugs positive affirmations were written. I felt chills when I saw that. It impacted me. Everything in their home has a purpose, and that purpose is based on health and healing. After some brief introductions, hugs, and enough small talk for me to feel pseudo-comfortable, I received what will always be referred to in my world as 'The Rundown'. They asked me a whooooole lot of questions about my body and it felt good to answer them honestly. It felt cleansing in itself to admit what I had been doing to myself. Abuse, really. I was eating dead food, drinking sugary poisons and inhaling chemicals that are fatal through smoking. They were very objective and clear on explaining to me what was really going on with my body. They explained to me SIMPLE things like digestion, hydration, food choice, toxicity, an alkaline versus an acidic body, effects of prescriptions on my body and the power of my emotions on my body. I use the word simple because as they told me these things I felt like I was remembering the Truth that I knew deep down but had never practiced. Once hearing it broken down like this, it sounded so simple. My body knew it was true, but my mind never made the connection. They facilitated my ability to stay connected to my body, and provided with the information sources and tools to do it on my own. "Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and feed him for a lifetime." To not leave my body to mindlessly eat, smoke, or drink poisons because I am uneducated or bored, became my passion. Ignorance and boredom are for lazy sloths. I was through with being consumed by this darkness. Bobby and Kerrie put me on a table and put all kinds of substances in my mouth to test me for food allergies. Wheat, yeast and dairy all weakened my immune system. They muscle tested me and discovered which muscles were weak, explained to me what nutritional deficiencies cause this, where I was missing this nutrition in in my diet, gave me some of the missing nutrient, and rubbed certain points on my body. They retested the weak muscles after running this protocol, and the weak muscles tested strong. I think I cried at some point because I had so many problems and questions before meeting them, and they just swept right in and showed me the light of truly living. I finally knew the Truth. To make a long story short (the long version will certainly be in my memoir), my life was changed that day for the better forever. I am operating at optimal health today because I follow the example that these people set for me. They ran dozens of muscle tests on my body that day, but the one that sticks with me the most is the test for dehydration. That is the first thing they test for, as most health problems stem from this and this alone! Most people are always dehydrated. This is so underestimated. I saw how important water was to them, and listened intently as they explained its vital role in bodily functions. Bobby and Kerrie had a reverse osmosis filter that filtered the whole house. The tap water was filtered through the main tank and then filtered again through the tap. Then they bottled it and treated it with Mega H. Mega H perfectly balances the water as close as possible to pristine, clean, fresh from-the-untainted-water. They gave me some water with Celtic sea salt mixed in to rehydrate me. The headache I had been fighting for three days was gone within five minutes of chugging the only-slightly-salty mixture. They explained to me proper sodium balance in the body, proper ratios of salt to water, and the importance of trace mineral balance. They explained to me what was really in tap water: aluminum, fluoride and other metals, traces of birth control, feces, pesticides and prescription drug residue because so many people ingest and pass them through the urine. They stored the water in glass as opposed to plastic because water leeches toxins from plastic (especially when heated.) Some of the glass gallons had magnets on each side, creating even more balanced and healing the water. They had words of love and encouragement placed all over the jugs. They showed me books on the healing powers of water and how water is affected by the words we say, written by the enlightened Doctor Emoto. I was entranced. I heeded the words they spoke and read the information they shared. This was four years ago, and here I am today still sharing and writing about it, following the example.
I bathed that day in healing waters. Metaphorically and literally. As an observant citizen of society I caution my fellow human citizens to be choosy and careful of the water in which you nourish your thirsts. Again, a metaphorical and literal piece of advice. I have consumed sweet healing water and also ingested toxic, poisonous, and scalding water in my day. Metaphorically, we are all thirsty for truth, spiritual knowledge, information and answers. There are many clever cats, and rats, who will offer your their goblets to quench your thirst. If you keep finding you are still thirsty or even sick, still going back to the same goblet, perhaps you should learn to fetch your own water. I have learned to drink only from the Source of the water itself, and avoid the middle man and any added ingredients that may have been tossed in along the way. Sip and sample the water of another, be inspired, drink your fill, but ultimately, it is your search. Tap into your own well. Be responsible and use discernment before taking too big of a swallow, or leaping into churning sea. What are you diving for? What are you thirsty for? Be clear on these inner intentions and you will become well hydrated with the waters of Truth and Love. Remain unclear on your intention, dive in blindly, and you may find the water is rancid, tainted, or too rough.
Physically one should know what they are putting into one's body. Our body is four-fifths water. That is almost our entire make up. We are water and dust. One must take in the right amount of water to stay healthy and hydrated. "Too little ain't good. Too much ain't either." Balance. If one is retaining water, it means they are not taking in enough. This may seem counter intuitive, but if the body becomes afraid it will not receive enough of something it holds on to it for dear life. Literally.
Hydrating our bodies with healthy water makes the difference between life and death. One of the most important functions of water is to flush toxins from the body. If we deny our bodies ease of this vital function, we are dead. I choose to show myself love through proper hydration. I spend the time to refill my three-gallon jugs with filtered water from the health food store. I'll buy the bottle of water (in glass when it's available) and refill it when it's empty with good water. I have been drinking pure water (Reverse Osmosis or Distilled works for me) for four years now, so when I taste tap water I can taste the heavy metals and impurities so strongly. I can smell them in the water without even having to taste it. When I first moved to Florida I drank a glass of tap water and ended up with horrible stomach pains and diarrhea. That was enough of an experience to show me! I rarely make exceptions to this commitment to myself. I love my body and show it by drinking the right amount of pure, blessed water.
Did you know that (when viewed under a microscope) a water molecule that has been blessed (ie. Holy Water) looks like a perfect snowflake? Symmetrical and flawless. Water that has been told it was 'ugly' and 'hated' looked like a yellow, disgusting blob. If our bodies are four-fifths water then what we say to our bodies REALLY matters! I look at myself everyday in the mirror and tell myself 'I love you!' I smile and I mean it. When I drink water I do it with love and rub my tummy. I know it may sound weird, but I am more vital and healthy at 25 then I was when I was 8 years old. I am the healthiest I have ever been. Hence, The Healthy Hooper creation. I am stoked to share this journey! If I can do it, anyone can. It began with something as simple as choosing good water over water that makes you sick. It begins with this. It began with someone having the courage to do it, someone else being inspired, and someone else reading about it and getting inspired and then inspiring someone else. Hell yeah! :) We are in this together.
The Healing Water is that which we drink in and accept it as good, true, pure and on purpose. I think dolphins are the most intelligent, highly evolved species on this planet, and they live in water. I dream of being a mermaid. I WAS a mermaid between the ages of 6-11. I still am, secretly. I love the water. I am pretty sure that a HUGE part of my deepest healing work has taken place under the full moon's light while immersed in the sea water of the Gulf. I have felt more comfort shedding my salty tears into her salty solution which holds me buoyant, with no effort, than in the arms of any human. Only ease. I have been healed by a good, hot shower. I have been healed looking over the glassy surface of a lake, watching the water ripple with tiny waves. I have been healed by consuming only water and no other liquids. I have healed my body with water, my mind with water, and my soul with The Waters. We need water to live. Water lives in us. There are so many metaphors one could derive from this concept.
Being introduced to the importance of this element changed me forever. I began this blog with an offering of gratitude to the ones who held my hand with my first step. I will conclude this blog with an offering of gratitude to the ones reading these words and will take it one step further. Thank you to each of you who step outside of the sandbox, and into the waves of uncertainty as you view the distant yet healing horizon. Thank you for being the one who doodles words of love and light onto your water bottles, or the one who christens your baby. Thank you for remember the parts of you (four-fifths!) that are water and watery in metaphorical nature. Thank you. Blessings as we dive deep into the infinite sea of you and me!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
Emerge or Die: HP4
We sat in the silence of the circle. The wood cracked and split in the fire as the crickets conducted their symphony under the moonlight. As he spoke, we observed our messenger, our mentor, our leader within the loop and life, and listened intently as if the words we meant for us alone. They were. Bax spoke to us on the concepts of life and death, happiness and sadness, blossoming and decay. 'Emerge or Die', he said. 'Emerge or die'. That was all I needed to hear. In that moment I was present, in congruence and agreement with this. I must emerge, spring forth, burst open, spill over and allow my essence to ooze forward with purpose, passion and hungry flame. Emerge or die. I must believe there is light above even as I am choked in the mire of illusion, spiraling through the muck until I break the surface. Gasping but alive. Emerge or die. I must fall deep into the silence of the cocoon, trusting that this process will lead me to colorful, winged flight, as vibrant tone and air alone sustain me. Emerge? Or, Die? A simple choice. There are many aspects of me that scream for emergence. It's an 'emergence emergency', if you will. So much of me is ready to paint, draw, color, be, swim, dance, laugh, heal, photograph, craft, cook, write, sing, make music, teach children, flexibly pose, comfort the old, and LOVE as I am discovering my infinite, limitless nature. There is also a large part of me that is ready to die, or has died and I have ignored the stench. Much of me is now ready to move forward. Be recycled. Decay and take new form. This is ok. I allow the break down to occur. My ego does not like the 'die' part of the double edged sword of evolution. The ego will support, on a superficial level, anything that brings it 'attention'. But the parts that are vulnerable, sensitive, and transparent...well...the ego protects those parts from being sloughed off. Die. There are parts of me I am absolutely ready to shed. I sat in the fire circle, with so many people I love and realized that 'Emerge or Die' also means 'Emerge AND Die'. For the death of the old composts the growth of the new. I have been conflicted in thinking it was one or the other. As a matter of fact, I have been conflicted thinking I must have one or the other in MANY areas of my life. "Be with a partner or be free". "Work for another or have my own entity". "Have a home or travel". "Commitment or freedom". I. Went. Crazy! So, to bring this full circle...Emerge AND Die. What we choose to allow to emerge and what we choose to allow to die is ours and ours alone. Either way, all is well.
This was my second year at Hoop Path. Last year I sat in that fire circle and cried and cried. So grateful for the hoop and it's people, grateful for my life, grateful for creative devotion and honored to just BE THERE sitting amongst the greats that inspired my beginning. The fire circle has fallen on my Hoopiversary (hoop anniversary) the last two years. That day is also Father's Day. The perfect synchronization. Let me tell you what has happened for me between last year on Father's Day and this year on Father's day. After I left Hoop Path I was determined to end my relationship with my Father, who I felt had wronged me and my mother irreparably. I thought this was the only way to heal it. To dismiss him. To make a long story short, within two weeks of the Father's Day/Summer Solstice fire circle at Hoop Path, I was finally friends with the man who was my Father. We actually sat down to talk and had major breakthroughs. I told him I had been mad at him since I was six. He was sorry, and I believed him. We connected, for the first time in 20 years. He ended up moving closer to me in St. Petersburg for a job, and we got to hang out on the beautiful Gulf coast of Florida together for three months. For anyone who knows me, this healing between my Father and I is profound. This is lifetimes of karmic contracts sealed and healed. I am lighter. Freer. Whole. If the hoop can help me within ONE YEAR to heal a relationship that I felt had been 'broken' for a lifetime, I simply can't imagine what healing it will facilitate for me now that I am in my second year. I have even greater understanding of the hoop and The Way that it opens now. So, this year, listening to Bax say three simple words, 'Emerge or Die', I realized that evolution is upon me once more.
Last year I let a huge part of me die. I let the parts of me that hated my father, hated my mother for loving my father, and hated myself for hating...die. I loved it and then released it. I forgave them and I forgave me. I put in it the fire, and let the fire burn it into dust with all of the old patterns and beliefs that enable that hatred. I acknowledged the emotion, and let it burn away. It took a while for this miraculous healing to be revealed, but I experienced it fully all the same. I know now to be patient and wait, observe the signs and symbols from Spirit, and allow the healing to happen. I am already feeling the Fourth Ring healing. My tree, my treasures, and my heart is expanding.
This year I feel I have more to take care of on the Emergence side of this coin. Be the Bird. The yin. The conception, creative fire, and birth of a new Me. A Self-Realized Shellie. Wow. It feels good to type that:)! Hoop Path was the perfect opportunity to become aware of who this is. What do I want to offer the world? What example do I want to set? Easy answer. I know my purpose. I am a healer. This is what I was born to do. I am grateful I realized this and went to massage school, educated myself daily on the body, and study as much as I can about what it means to Be Healthy. My healing hands have sustained me for the last four years. It is what paid for me to come to Hoop Path and stay in Carborro for a short duration post retreat. I came to Hoop Path as 'the resident massage therapist'. My community came to me when they felt they needed to tune-in and tune-up their bodies after workshops. It was an honor to set up shop in Beth's barn and treat local Hoop Path-ers in such a beautiful setting. I was in another zone doing healing work in that Barn. The wood resonates and vibrates an ethereal holiness that is the residue of passionate dance. I could feel it all the way down to my bones. The healer in me emerged full of fire and courage as I stepped forward in the community and said "This is what I offer, and I do so in the name of Love, Light and the Greater Good!" Emerge or Die. I choose to Emerge, as I step into the responsibility and power of Being the Healer. As soon as I did this within, perfect opportunities happened externally to validate this acknowledgment of Self. I am officially the second therapist to join the ranks at Hoop Camp, and will be offering massage to the community at this amazing retreat! I am blessed that this is my reality.
My creative Spirit spilled forth while I was in Carborro. I wrote in my journal and filled the 1G memory card in my Cannon Powershot twice over. After being inspired by my soul sister Erin Sparrow, I am taking pictures of everything I find beautiful which is well, everything. Thank you, Sparrow! I was gifted with a wonderful Barnmate during my short stay with Beth. Brecken was my company in the barn, so needless to say there was much hoop exploration and discovery between massages and heart-to-heart soul spillings. I am truly blessed. Brecken inspires me on so many levels as an artist. Her combination of modern dance with her unique style truly moves me to tears. Thank you, Brecken. And just to move backwards in the story to the actual retreat and workshops...Talk about INSPIRING! I am always entranced when in Baxter's workshops. He really does lead one into the deep waters. Sometimes I find myself treading water, just barely staying afloat on the service. Other times, when in the deep water, I find I have the endurance to dive deeeeeeeep down to the bottom and sit in the stillness that is always within the center of the spin. Thank you, Baxter, for watering the seedlings that were hardly aware of their existence. While in workshop with Ann, I found her conceptual notions of 'Exploring the Outer Space' very challenging and fascinating. I realized how stuck I was in habitual hoop patterns. I've been hooping two years now, so it was eye opening to realize how habitual my hooping had become. Thank you, Ann, for helping me step outside of MY CIRCLE, and explore my own untouched Universe, and for your blessing toward my healing as well. It meant so much :)Khan Wong and Brecken Rivara were amazing additions to the retreat. Khan's workshop left me feeling incredibly reverent for life itself. In the softness of the movements, the precision of hoop locale, and the awareness found between hoop and body, I was overwhelmed with a sense of peace. I feel as though Khan himself brought that presence. Thank you, Khan, for being a shining example of simplicity, humility, and grace. As for Brecken's workshop... her theories pushed my mind to the point where it shut down completely, a wonderful gift. I must remove my mind and leave the work to the nuances of body awareness to grasp her explanations of movement. Once my mind is frustrated enough, it exits the scene, and my body allows evolution to flow without restraint. Thank you, Brecken, for taking us into the womb of your creative soul and allowing us to absorb your divine dance. Of course, I was majorly inspired by the other hoop dancers that trekked to the The Mecca of Carborro. I am always humbled as I watch the FlowCase. Sparks totally rocked my face off this year with her super sexy Boom Boom Pow Belly Dance Scarf number. It was a pleasure to perform a piece with the Hoola Monsters (my most intimate Flow Family:) and receive love from an honest, open and loving extended Flow Family. I'm honored to be a part of this community!
The retreat and all that occurred the week after is blissfully blurred together. I merged fluidly from healing and hooping at Hoop Path to fulfilling my yearly tradition of root connections on Edisto Island with the women in my family. I will poetically document this in my next blog. Hoop Path opened the door for me, as it always does, into my own personal space of self-realization, discovery and transformation. I am eternally grateful that I am able to be involved with this amazing operation as a Healer and humble Hoop Dancer. Thank you to all who participated, and to those who are reading these words. Someone once told me "We are great because we are blessed". Thank you for blessing me with your presence and support. It sustains me on this Path. Namaste!
This was my second year at Hoop Path. Last year I sat in that fire circle and cried and cried. So grateful for the hoop and it's people, grateful for my life, grateful for creative devotion and honored to just BE THERE sitting amongst the greats that inspired my beginning. The fire circle has fallen on my Hoopiversary (hoop anniversary) the last two years. That day is also Father's Day. The perfect synchronization. Let me tell you what has happened for me between last year on Father's Day and this year on Father's day. After I left Hoop Path I was determined to end my relationship with my Father, who I felt had wronged me and my mother irreparably. I thought this was the only way to heal it. To dismiss him. To make a long story short, within two weeks of the Father's Day/Summer Solstice fire circle at Hoop Path, I was finally friends with the man who was my Father. We actually sat down to talk and had major breakthroughs. I told him I had been mad at him since I was six. He was sorry, and I believed him. We connected, for the first time in 20 years. He ended up moving closer to me in St. Petersburg for a job, and we got to hang out on the beautiful Gulf coast of Florida together for three months. For anyone who knows me, this healing between my Father and I is profound. This is lifetimes of karmic contracts sealed and healed. I am lighter. Freer. Whole. If the hoop can help me within ONE YEAR to heal a relationship that I felt had been 'broken' for a lifetime, I simply can't imagine what healing it will facilitate for me now that I am in my second year. I have even greater understanding of the hoop and The Way that it opens now. So, this year, listening to Bax say three simple words, 'Emerge or Die', I realized that evolution is upon me once more.
Last year I let a huge part of me die. I let the parts of me that hated my father, hated my mother for loving my father, and hated myself for hating...die. I loved it and then released it. I forgave them and I forgave me. I put in it the fire, and let the fire burn it into dust with all of the old patterns and beliefs that enable that hatred. I acknowledged the emotion, and let it burn away. It took a while for this miraculous healing to be revealed, but I experienced it fully all the same. I know now to be patient and wait, observe the signs and symbols from Spirit, and allow the healing to happen. I am already feeling the Fourth Ring healing. My tree, my treasures, and my heart is expanding.
This year I feel I have more to take care of on the Emergence side of this coin. Be the Bird. The yin. The conception, creative fire, and birth of a new Me. A Self-Realized Shellie. Wow. It feels good to type that:)! Hoop Path was the perfect opportunity to become aware of who this is. What do I want to offer the world? What example do I want to set? Easy answer. I know my purpose. I am a healer. This is what I was born to do. I am grateful I realized this and went to massage school, educated myself daily on the body, and study as much as I can about what it means to Be Healthy. My healing hands have sustained me for the last four years. It is what paid for me to come to Hoop Path and stay in Carborro for a short duration post retreat. I came to Hoop Path as 'the resident massage therapist'. My community came to me when they felt they needed to tune-in and tune-up their bodies after workshops. It was an honor to set up shop in Beth's barn and treat local Hoop Path-ers in such a beautiful setting. I was in another zone doing healing work in that Barn. The wood resonates and vibrates an ethereal holiness that is the residue of passionate dance. I could feel it all the way down to my bones. The healer in me emerged full of fire and courage as I stepped forward in the community and said "This is what I offer, and I do so in the name of Love, Light and the Greater Good!" Emerge or Die. I choose to Emerge, as I step into the responsibility and power of Being the Healer. As soon as I did this within, perfect opportunities happened externally to validate this acknowledgment of Self. I am officially the second therapist to join the ranks at Hoop Camp, and will be offering massage to the community at this amazing retreat! I am blessed that this is my reality.
My creative Spirit spilled forth while I was in Carborro. I wrote in my journal and filled the 1G memory card in my Cannon Powershot twice over. After being inspired by my soul sister Erin Sparrow, I am taking pictures of everything I find beautiful which is well, everything. Thank you, Sparrow! I was gifted with a wonderful Barnmate during my short stay with Beth. Brecken was my company in the barn, so needless to say there was much hoop exploration and discovery between massages and heart-to-heart soul spillings. I am truly blessed. Brecken inspires me on so many levels as an artist. Her combination of modern dance with her unique style truly moves me to tears. Thank you, Brecken. And just to move backwards in the story to the actual retreat and workshops...Talk about INSPIRING! I am always entranced when in Baxter's workshops. He really does lead one into the deep waters. Sometimes I find myself treading water, just barely staying afloat on the service. Other times, when in the deep water, I find I have the endurance to dive deeeeeeeep down to the bottom and sit in the stillness that is always within the center of the spin. Thank you, Baxter, for watering the seedlings that were hardly aware of their existence. While in workshop with Ann, I found her conceptual notions of 'Exploring the Outer Space' very challenging and fascinating. I realized how stuck I was in habitual hoop patterns. I've been hooping two years now, so it was eye opening to realize how habitual my hooping had become. Thank you, Ann, for helping me step outside of MY CIRCLE, and explore my own untouched Universe, and for your blessing toward my healing as well. It meant so much :)Khan Wong and Brecken Rivara were amazing additions to the retreat. Khan's workshop left me feeling incredibly reverent for life itself. In the softness of the movements, the precision of hoop locale, and the awareness found between hoop and body, I was overwhelmed with a sense of peace. I feel as though Khan himself brought that presence. Thank you, Khan, for being a shining example of simplicity, humility, and grace. As for Brecken's workshop... her theories pushed my mind to the point where it shut down completely, a wonderful gift. I must remove my mind and leave the work to the nuances of body awareness to grasp her explanations of movement. Once my mind is frustrated enough, it exits the scene, and my body allows evolution to flow without restraint. Thank you, Brecken, for taking us into the womb of your creative soul and allowing us to absorb your divine dance. Of course, I was majorly inspired by the other hoop dancers that trekked to the The Mecca of Carborro. I am always humbled as I watch the FlowCase. Sparks totally rocked my face off this year with her super sexy Boom Boom Pow Belly Dance Scarf number. It was a pleasure to perform a piece with the Hoola Monsters (my most intimate Flow Family:) and receive love from an honest, open and loving extended Flow Family. I'm honored to be a part of this community!
The retreat and all that occurred the week after is blissfully blurred together. I merged fluidly from healing and hooping at Hoop Path to fulfilling my yearly tradition of root connections on Edisto Island with the women in my family. I will poetically document this in my next blog. Hoop Path opened the door for me, as it always does, into my own personal space of self-realization, discovery and transformation. I am eternally grateful that I am able to be involved with this amazing operation as a Healer and humble Hoop Dancer. Thank you to all who participated, and to those who are reading these words. Someone once told me "We are great because we are blessed". Thank you for blessing me with your presence and support. It sustains me on this Path. Namaste!
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